rants

sigh.
i think i'm losing steam.

i dunno.
but it's like.
sian.
maybe it's just me.
something that i need to deal with.

but to be honest.
i don't like.
the way it is.
it's like things get taiji-ed around.
it's like there's the pressure to get things done.
but there isn't the support to help push things forward.
it's like you have a team.
yet not quite exactly a team.

oh well. maybe i just have got to stop complaining.
that's all.
but honestly, it's easier said than done.

God, help me.
i need your joy to be my strength.

song in my heart

i realised that it's been ages since i last blogged.
hehe. i've been getting lazy to update with the load at work.
sometimes i just feel that i have enough of facing the computer of 8 working hours each day that my eyes are just too tired to bare with more when i'm back home.
hehe. so the conclusion is. i've been getting out-of-touch with msn, with blogger, sometimes with facebook too (the only thing that i do is probably accept friend requests, post some photos if any, etc).

anyway. i just felt that posting a blog today.
because when i was back home this afternoon.
i was tired from the lack of rest and from the hot afternoon.
but i was so encouraged.
somehow i heard voices which i believe came from the church nearby.
from distant, i can hear voices singing songs of worship to God.
the 2 songs i heard - I Worship You, Almighty God and Through It All.
to me, it brought much joy and gladness because.
for once i really felt i understand what it is like when we sing
from the mountains to the valley
hear our praises rise to You
from the heavens to the nations
let our singing fill the air

how wonderful. i thought.
how beautiful.
i love music.
i love singing.
i thank God for my voice.
i'm glad i still have it.

Lord, may my mouth be one that offers such wonderful praises to You.
simply because You are deserving.
let there always be a song in my heart.
just for You alone.

song in my heart - i adore

looking back at 2008

2008 has been...

a nice end to varsity life.
a conclusion to my 3 years in NTU.
having a nice family potrait taken to commemorate this occasion.
i believe mum's relieved to have one more of us graduating.
in a way. she has one load off her mind.
still, a mum never stops worrying for her children.
and i'm thankful for such a strong mum.
and thank God for walking me through the 3 years.
He has been faithful - the blessings in terms of results, in terms of the whole university experience.
i thank God that i graduate well. i can never forget how got God blessed me with superbly awesome grades for a semester which i struggled very badly.
in the difficult times, God proved His sovereignty and faithfulness.
i stand in awe, really.
and with the graduation, a nice family potrait taken. :)


a fresh start to working life.
the transition - i wouldn't say it's easy.
i probably would have gone crazy without the grace of God.
i thank God for the favour He has shown.
it's really amazing.
the times i just have small gifts from managers or fellow colleagues that just bring such encouragement and smiles. especially when it's the stressful peak.
i thank God for His strength to see me through.
i was really worn out during the November peak.
but God saw me through.
a tough season but it was reassuring knowing that God is faithful to see me through every season.
and of cos. there were various moments of fun, which i really enjoyed.


a wonderful display of God's faithfulness.
being involved in the RAW camp as a prayer co-ordinator really opened my eyes to see the hand of God moving through prayer.
the weather, the move of God during the services, the whole preparation phase, etc.
many many things that i just can't stop thanking God for.
it's a fresh RAW start from there.
authentic - get real.
consecrate - set apart for the Lord Almighty.
first love - make me a woman of passion for the things of God.
transform - change me to be more like Jesus.


a great missions experience.
going to Philippines was something i had wanted to when i first became a Christian.
and the 2 weeks there was an eye-opener.
the lessons learnt.
taking steps out of being fearful of the opinions of others.
seeing how privileged i am in Singapore.
realising the need to lay down my pride.
learning to watch out for others.
allowing God to teach me to be a prayer warrior.

many many more things which i need to really take time to ponder over.
i shall add on to this when i'm done taking time to reflect.
reflect upon in preparation of this year of increase - 2009. :)

"i will run. i will soar on eagle's wings. as i wait on You Lord, my strength is restored."

anyway. a summary of the key changes during this 3 months.

i went for the company's dnd and recognised that i am really not those who likes functions.
i got a drastic hair cut.
i went through a crazy November peak with 10 pm end work timings for one week and 11 pm ones for the week after.
i went for the most awesome camp ever - RAW!
i had time to catch up with linda and chiew lin at crystal jade la mian xiao long bao on a weekday evening. (it was ages since we last met!)
i tried being chibi maruko chan (which nobody has any idea what it is) at the C party.
i went shopping with peishan at ikea. and we got quite crazy there. (finally we met up!)
i had a fun baking session with the cell group and a lunch get-together on Christmas eve.
i had fun celebrating Christmas.
i got rather put off by an unreasonable mercz driver who kicked up a fuss over a scratch.
i enjoyed playing blind mice, polar bear (still remember the 6a days?) at the leaders' retreat.
it was a superb thanksgiving ceremony.

i'm quite lazy to get all the photos up. so this shall look like a wordy update. haha.
i shall try to update more frequently so that i won't put myself off posting photos.

happy children's day!

i haven't been blogging for a while.
not that i'm that busy.
more so of being lazy.
hehe.

work's getting busier.
but i'm thankful for nice people.
i thank God for His favour.
:)

i'm slowly coming to understand.
there's no perfect job.
so i'm learning to be thankful in my situation.
please don't get me wrong.
i like my job.
i know there are challenges.
there are things i don't know.
but i thank God for a perspective that strengthens me.
when i'm tired.
when i'm learning to adjust.
when i'm just vexed by getting stuck at a piece of work.
i'm learning to appreciate the nice work environment.
i've yet to do up my table.
lazy me.
hehe.
i shall take photos when i do it up!
there are nice people.
there are fun times.
there are quite a handful of end-work-on-time days.

anyway.
just some photos to make the entries a bit more interesting.
here's what happened thus far (other than work).


a month ago.
it was teachers' day.
it was really amazingly sweet to have received lovely cards from the children.
and it just makes you smile when you read what they wrote on the cards.
i thank God for the opportunity to be a teacher in the children church.
it is no doubt a privilege.
and a great blessing.
:) i've received much.
to think that it's been quite a while serving in this ministry.
i guess it's something that was previously beyond my imagination.
but this is something i treasure.
and i am learning to be faithful in all these things that God places in my hands.


attend this about a week ago.
too bad my best pal linda wasn't around.
they were all asking about how come you aren't around cos we come as a pair!
haha.
just to keep my dearest buddy company and to get a free dinner.
i decided to still make a trip down to the NTU Alumni Club for the dinner.
well. at least it's not somewhere far.
hehe. just a time of eating and loads of laughter.
the only thing is.
the conversation somehow still revolves around work.
hehe. i guess the thing about moving on to a new phase in life is that.
such conversations eventually come into place.
haha.
a sign that i'm growing older.
oops. :X

i've been getting quite lazy.
and somehow.
i think i need God to give me a hard push to buck up.
i've been thinking about.
what it really means.
to give my life away.
i can only say.
i need the grace of God.

finally.

finally. updates!
hehe.
sorry. i've been too lazy to blog.

anyway. shall try to keep this short too. it's been really long since i last posted something on this blog.
and so much has happened.

in summary.
my may and june holidays have been well spent.
may - 2 wonderful weeks in philippines.
which was totally a great experience.
i miss it.

june - 1 week of church camp in kl.
where i got a splendid birthday celebration from the cell and some others.
it was a time of being renewed in the Lord.
june - 8 days in korea.
shall be posting photos in this entry.
june to july - 1 week in penang.
as a start to working life.
i began my first week at penang for a training.
it was a time of good food.
and loads of rest.

july - you see zhien as a workaholic.
who seldom blogs.
july - convocation ceremony. an official end to my undergraduate studies.
haha.

oh well.
here goes a little more details.


on the flight to korea.
hehe.
all ready for some fun and egg-citement. >.<


a marvellous sight!
this is @ jeju island.
according to the tour guide. there's plenty of such volcanic rocks at the island.
it's just that at the place we went. the rocks form a dragon head.
i couldn't really tell though.
haha.


a typical straw house on jeju island.
one of the sights at jeju not to be missed.
the houses are interesting.
the rods at the 'main gate' of the house tells visitors whether the owner is in or not.
cool right?


a visit to the teddy bear museum at jeju island.
the must-see for gong fans.
haha.
teddy bears are so cute!


i couldn't resist hugging one to take a photo.
it's too big to be bought and brought back to singapore though.


a jet boat ride that threw us into the most un-glam state.
but it was really cool.
i had wanted more adventure rather than just pure sight-seeing.
so it was really fun darting round a part of the island on a jet boat.
hehe.


visited the green tea museum.
i grew to love green tea through this trip.
hehe.


o la la o la la...
da chang jin.
haha.
the korean folk village which is well-known to be the film site for the mega k-drama.


me with a horse.
hehe. the first time i so boldly go closer to one without making a fuss.
hehe.


me with mummy at a pond in the korean folk village.
it was a place with really nice scenery.
a great place to take photos at.


went to everland.
this really nice themepark.
and i took the roller coaster in the background.
it is a super shiok ride.
haha.
the track is made of wood.
it's a HUGE structure. haha.
with one of the falling angle at 75 degrees.
haha.
can be quite scary.
but nonetheless. really SHIOK!


the ride: t-express.
me after the roller coaster experience.


another day. we went visiting the unification park.
went touring this submarine.
and got my head bumped quite a few times.
thank God we were given helmets.
haha.


if you've never seen one before.
now you see it.
a samsung car.
haha.
the front and the back.


we spent one night staying at this really cosy resort.
where there's a kitchen in the room. hehe.
it's really a very nice place for a family gathering.
haha.
way way nicer than any chalet you find in singapore.


and we tasted this really nice ricecake.
and the museum was a display of really nice and interesting creation.
haha.
i think i really like to be able to cook and make nice stuff.
i'm probably just too lazy to get to action that's all.
hehe.


another declaration.
i love starbucks.
if you want to know how to write starbucks in korean.
just see this pic!


a photo with the tour guide and the photographer sent by the korean tourism board.
hehe.
this was at our shopping area for the last day.
haha.

it was quite an experience.
there are more photos but i'm rather lazy to post them all.

anyway.
other photos.


catch a glimpse of my cubicle at office.
i've got a work area to myself.
haha.
a nice desktop.
an interesting phone.
i've yet to decorate it though.
still finding time to pick out photos to send for developing!
do feel free to give me ideas on how to make it look sweet and nice.
it now just looks like a WORK PLACE.


another place in my office.
the pantry.
which is a nice-looking chill-out place.
i seriously don't mind buying lunch back to eat here.
beats squeezing with the crowd.
and adopting the unspoken raffles place rule about using tissue paper to 'kop' seats.
hehe.

another exciting thing that took place in the month of july.
convocation!
i was given a full day off.
which is good!
hehe.

shall just post the photos and let the pictures do the talking.










many thanks to those who made a difference to my uni life.
thanks to mum and sis and ying who have been a great support.
thank God for His many blessings through my 3 years.
there's just so much to give thanks for.
i'm glad.

moving in and adjusting to a new phase in life.
God, use me to bring glory to Your name.

well. zhi'en out.
i wanna go sleep.
hehe.

shall blog soon.
when there's interesting things to share!

여보세요

hi.
i'm in seoul/korea!
hehe.
now at gimpo international airport.
waiting for the flight to jeju.

i'll be back on 26th! :)

no more MIA-ing

i haven't been updating for quite some time.
so i shall just do a quick one for now.
hehe.

12th to 24th may.
i was in philippines.
i don't have much photos to post cos i don't have them with me yet.

day 1 morning the team of us departed from singapore budget terminal.
reached philippines clark airport after an approximately 3-hr long flight.
then hopped on a jeepney.
having 16 people squeezed on a jeepney wasn't a pleasant thing.
it was crammed.
honest.
the first discomfort that i faced during the 13-day long trip.
and it was just the beginning.
the only thing that was really bad was i was sick.
so it added to the discomfort.
but i thank God.
for people who cared.
for sustaining me.
for making me well again after a short nap on the jeepney.
so the rest of the 15-hr long ride on the jeepney wasn't as bad.

we went to a rural area in bilcol region.
my biggest lesson learnt is to learn to appreciate what i'm blessed with over here in singapore.
most people there don't have tv, laptops, proper beds to sleep on...
some families can't even afford refrigerators.
electricity wasn't a constant supply. it short circuits easily.
the roofs leak when it rains.
the list can go on.
i just wonder.
many a times i just take things for granted.
how i just need to learn to be thankful for even the smallest thing i'm blessed with.

also the filipinos are really hospitable people.
at least for those that i met.
i can conclude so.
i think that's one thing i'll need to learn to practise too.
it's been a missions trip which i felt i was so well-taken care of.
they gave.
to the best of what they can.
another learning point.

some of the more significant moments include...


i had this taken on my phone.
climbing a mountain!
it was not as high.
but it was steep enough.
it was quite a climb.
but i really enjoyed it.
we did a performance at the village when we got up.
gave out vitamins to the people and prayed for them.
to the extent that i had a hard time pulling brakes when i tried running down the slope on the way down.
i'm just amazed when i was told.
a fellow filipino brethren would go once a week climbing the mountain just to conduct bible study with a few of the villagers.
going the second mile.
i was indeed challenged.
how i need to learn. faithfulness - another lesson i was thought.

i learnt to act by faith with boldness.
terence and i partnered with 2 of our filipino sisters (rosemary and joan) to go house-to-house to share the Gospel.
we talked they translated.
and i remember that day so clearly that i was just telling terence that maybe we can pray for the sick along the streets if there are any.
and the next moment is.
we passed by a hospital on our left.
and there we decided that we should go in and pray for the people.
i was amazed how smoothly we stepped into the hospital without facing any obstacles.
no nurse or doctor stopped us.
though it was obvious that we aren't local.
surely, no person would think i'm a filipino.
the first ward was the infant's ward.
i prayed for a child. initially she was crying badly.
but at the end of the prayer.
she actually stopped crying!
praise the Lord. i'm so amazed.
i figured the child was better.
then went to pray for this old man with breathing difficulties.
he mentioned something about a hole in his lungs.
i shared the Gospel with him.
and he listened. and he actually said he believe Jesus can heal him.
i'm just so amazed. (i don't think i can stop saying this.)
prayed for him and he said he felt better.
the doctor's report weren't out yet.
but by faith. his health will be restored.
my day at the hospital - fruitful.

i did the craziest thing ever.
the team of us sang and danced in the middle of a park in ligao city.
our filipino brethrens call it 'encounter at the park'.
so in front of everyone at the park. we did a performance.
making our stage 360 degrees viewable.
boldly went sharing the Gospel with people.
and i thank God for the opportunities to share my testimony.
i'm just amazed.
how God worked through all that was done.
in a crazy setting.
to lead people to Him.


we went to this really nice beach resort at marinab for the church camp with the filipino brethrens.
it was really a nice place.
and it was a great time interacting with them.
during the church camp, we saw how powerfully God moved.

it's just saddening to see how beautiful the beach resort can be.
and yet on the other side of the hill.
is a village where poverty hits the lives of people.
i remember the night where we climbed over the hill to the village to pray for the burangay captain of the area, a blackout occurred.
and the entire place was in total darkness.

we also did medical missions in a village in marinab.
i learnt how to clean and treat wounds properly.
like how a nurse would do it.
i learnt how to do blood sugar test.
though my main task was to help prepare the instrument needed.
practically. we shared the love of Christ with the people there.
God taught me how to be practical in loving His people - meet their needs.

the night at the village, we had a concert.
through it, we saw 60 salvations from the youths and adults.
and 50 salvations from the children group too.
the whole area was just lit up by ONE light bulb.
the concert went on with the bare minimum.
but God did a miracle.
thank God. it can only be Him.

through the 2 weeks.
other than learning to step out of my comfort zone.
i learnt much more.
about myself.
how self-centered i can be. selfish.
i'm still learning.
to put others before self.
i learnt how to root my confidence in the Lord.
not in my own strength.
but leaving it in His hands.
i've got more to learn.
God, mould me and shape me.
to be more like You, Jesus.

now i'm back. more tanned.
hehe.


came back with my sister giving me a pair of new running shoes.
cos mine was cui long time back.
hehe.
i'm so blessed.
thanks sis!
i love it so much.

27th may.

went on a cycling trip at east coast park.
it was quite a butt-aching experience.
having to cycle from ecp all the way to changi village. and back.
i was taught. perseverance.

31st may.
romp'08.
it was a blast.
i enjoyed myself playing captain's ball.
hehe.
i've been getting rather good time for workout since i got back from philippines.
i played badminton on the following tuesday.

3rd june.
got my haircut and highlights done.
hehe.
i love my new hair now!
and i'm so happy that i got a good deal.
50 bucks for haircut and highlighting for my hair length.
is quite a good bargain already.
hehe.

4th june.
i had a nice time catching up with ken over starbucks.
tried the new dark mocha frappucino blended coffee.
it was woo-lala good.
haha.
i realised i forgot to snap a picture of it.
thanks ken for the treat to a VENTI-sized drink.
i just enjoy chilling at starbucks.
hehe.
more more!

6th june.

i had an early birthday dinner with my family at waraku.
had intended to go pasta de waraku.
but apparently a mistake in making reservations.
still. the food was good.
just that i was having a terrible cold.
so i look rather worn out in my picture with mum.


i just want to say it again.
I LOVE MY FAMILY!
they are a great bunch of people.
i'm so blessed.
thanks for the birthday celebration.

7th june.
sisters fellowship.
hehe.
simple games.
but we all had a great time.
i guess we need more of such.
bonding time!

hehe.
ok i shall now go and rest.
else i'll be too tired tmr.
hehe.

9th to 13th june.
i'll be in kl.
so i guess i'll be MIA-ing for a while.
ciao!