updates on my week

i realised that i haven't been really blogging abt recent happenings.
it's mid-way through the month of january for the new year.

school's ok.
i'm lagging behind quite badly for my readings.
so i've got to buck up and seriously do something more constructive.
this blog may somehow be neglected in the process.
oh well.
haha.

had a good time catching up with gloria on monday.
it's been so long.
and i'm glad we had a good talk.
i'm just thankful.
that despite having not sit down and talk to her for so long.
it's always so comfortable to talk to her and share.
it was a light-hearted lunch.
and i'm truly blessed. :)
let's have more! hehe.


anyway.
i've got my first guitar!
went shopping for it for a really short while on tuesday.
thanks to my 'shi fu' nic.
i got one that's nice.
and it was a good deal.
235 bucks.
a nice acoustic guitar.
came with guitar bag, tuner, picks, beginner's guidebook cum cd, dvd.
and it's really time to get down to some serious practicing!
i realise i've happily thrown back what i've learnt.
hehe.
whatever it is.
i'm just very happy.
having planned for so long.
finally i've got my very own guitar.
yippie!


and for the first time ever.
had breakfast with weisin and teeseng at ntu.
teeseng happily 'skipped' tutorial.
to makan with us.
hehe.
i had hotcakes from macs!
it's been some time since i had macs breakfast.
hehe.
after that we went crashing teeseng's hall.
popped by his hall only to realise how messy it is.
haha.
played with his mac and took loads of wacky multi-shots.
haha. we look so happy, don't we?
decided to post one of the rare few nicer ones.
and we scanned through the pics in his mac.
only to see how 'toot' we look when we were in secondary school.
goodness.
super embarrassing.
i would never want those photos circulated!
haha.
it'll be so hilarious.
it was quite a good time catching up.
hehe.
rare opportunities to do so.
and i hope there'll be more.
it's gonna be harder once i start work.
i can't imagine.

more catching up with ppl next week.
i need to better manage my time.
so that i can be a good student.
and i can be effective in the different things i'm doing.

God, help me be a good steward.
the time you place in my hands.
help me to use them wisely.
to do Your work.
and excel in all that You've called me to do.

second chance

second chance

You called my name

reached out Your hand

restored my life

and i was redeemed

the moment You entered my life

amazing grace

Christ gave that day

my life was changed

when from my shoulders

fell the weight of my sin

so it's with everything i am

i reach out for Your hand

the hope for change

the second chance i've gained

on You i throw my life

casting all my fears aside

how could greater love than this

ever possibly exist

consume my thoughts

as i rest in You

i'm now in love

with a Savior

bearing the marks of His love

so i'll wait upon You now

with my hands released to You

where a little faith's enough

to see mountains lift and move

and i'll wait upon You now

dedicated to Your will

to this love that will remain

a love that never fails

i can never imagine.
how my life has changed.
since that very day.
it's just amazing.
His love is amazing.
and i'm thankful.

how privileged.
to be given this second chance.
ask me again what i would choose that very day.
i can proudly say.
i'm so glad i took that step of faith.
and i never had regrets about that.

though i may face mountains.
but i know.
He reassures me.
a little faith's enough, My child.

there's surely more in my life that needs refining.
i'm sure He has more goodness in store.
and i can only stand.
amazed by His grace.

i love Jesus.

the rain - thomas kinkade

i saw this from an email that was being sent to me.
it was incomplete.
so out of curiosity.
i went google-ing.
and found this.
and i thought it would be interesting to share.
read on what i've got from a website.


one rainy afternoon i was driving along one of the main streets of town,
taking those extra precautions necessary when the roads are wet and slick.
suddenly my daughter, aspen, spoke up from her relaxed position in her seat.
"dad, i'm thinking of something."
this annoucement usually meant she had been pondering some fact for a while,
and was now ready to expound all that her 6-year-old mind had discovered.
i was eager to hear.
"what are you thinking?"
i asked.

"the rain!" she began,
"is like sin, and the windshield wipers are like God wiping our sins away."
after the chill bumps raced up my arms i was able to respond.
"that's really good, aspen."
then my curiosity broke in.
how far would this little girl take this revelation?
so i asked...
"do you notice how the rain keeps on coming?
what does that tell you?"
aspen didn't hesitate one moment with her answer.
"we keep on sinning,
and God just keeps on forgiving us."
i will always remember this whenever i turn my wipers on.

in order to see the rainbow,
you must first endure some rain.

hope the water flows when you get the picture.

if God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.
happy moments, praise God.
difficult moments, seek God.
quiet moments, worship God.
painful moments, trust God.
every moment, thank God.

how beautiful... :)

marching into 2008

501st post for the 1st post in 2008.

entering into 2008.
and i just have so much to be thankful for for 2007.

in 2007 has been an eventful year.
with quite some changes in my life.

things that happened that brought tears.
and some that brought joy.
i continue to stand amazed by how God has brought me through.

i'm thankful for all that has happened.
i know that i wouldn't be where i am today if all that has happened didn't happened.
the things that broke me within.
though upsetting, yet i see myself strengthened in the process.
this year. it's not hiding my hurts and pains behind a false strong front.
but really learning to overcome with God's strength.
daring to cry out. daring to say i'm hurting within.
daring to say i need Him. daring to admit that i'm weak.
2007 - things went through change, which i thought was a negative change.
but looking at how things unfold, i saw how God turned things for good.
i've given up little and gained much.

defintely good things have happened.

i saw my family's love. one of my source of joy and strength.
my 21st birthday was a blast. though i can faint at the sigh of the number of people.
but it was my sister that did all the preparations.
catering. planning. booking the place. etc.
my mum who entertained those who came.
and i saw how much they spent just to get me the very present that i want.
i treasure it.
not because it is a material good.
but because it was from them. my dearest family.

i saw my friends being a great support.
those that came for my birthday made it special.
those that comforted me when i was grieving.
those who encouraged when i was discouraged.
those who walked me through the really tough times.
thank you.
thank you peishan for being the friend that i don't get to catch up with often, but i know you're always ready to be around and spend time with me.
thank you linda for being the friend that always support me in all that i do. you never question my decisions and just support me. thanks for the care. thanks for the company during lectures. thanks for way you are just so bubbly. it is contagious.
thank you chiewlin. i'm truly sorry that we don't get to interact that much ever since i'm out of hall. but i thank you for being a friend. i've always loved your company. :)
thank you beelian. you are one who really knows what i've been through - the good and the bad. thank you for mentoring me, but more importantly, walking through with me as a really close friend. you see the times when i'm weak and you're just there to align my focus back to God, who is strong. thanks for being the person i know i can turn to any time.
thank you christabel. you're a friend that i've gained this year. i'm just amazed how much our friendship grew this year. i'm thankful for the support all this while. daring to just speak the truth and point out the things that i need to note. thank you. a truthful friend is rare.
and of course, many others who have made a difference in my life.
thank you.

i saw how God preserved me and moulded me.
though there was the breaking, the stretching.
He was the one that sustained me.
through the times i felt i was running out of time to do things.
He gave me strength.
through the pressure of schoolwork, adjustments and exams.
i saw God's hand of blessings and His provision.
my results from the exams this year was way beyond my expectations.
God did it. not me.
through the new challenges.
i saw how God used me and the extent of His grace.
He provided all that was needed.
more responsibilities in the cell group.
publicity co-ordinator for youth rally.
team leader on my first mission trip.
leading and guiding people.
i walked through them all.
it wouldn't have been possible with my own strength.
it was only possible with Christ.

i saw how God relighted dreams and passion.
i've lost them along the way in 2007.
but God brought them back.
i was down. but He picked me up.
i was sad. but He brought joy.
i was weak. but He was the strength.

there's just so much that mere words cannot express.
i'm thankful. and this is only a summary.
i was just taking time today to reflect.
and i saw so much that God has done.
i continue to stand in awe.
i give thanks. to my loving Father in Heaven.

2008 is going to be more glorious.
i believe in all things. God works for the good of those who love Him.

and i simply love this song now.
somehow it speaks to me.
and brings such reassurance that i'm in good hands.

with all i am

into Your hand
i commit again
with all i am
for You Lord

You hold my world
in the palm of Your hand
and i'm Yours forever

Jesus i believe in You
Jesus i belong to You
You're the reason that i live
the reason that i sing
with all i am

i'll walk with You
wherever You go
through tears and joy
i'll trust in You

and i will live
in all of Your ways and
Your promises forever

i will worship i will worship You forever

500th post

this is my 500th post.
haha. this blog has sure come a long way.
i can't believe i actually crapped 500 entries out.
haha.
but well. they are still the bits and pieces of what goes on for me.
my thoughts. my life.

shall just post a bit to update.
though the 500th post shld be use for sthg more significant i guess.
but well. i'll probably use the 501st post for thanksgiving instead then.
and use this to just update before i set off for segamat once again.
yes i'm leaving again.
from 27th to 29th i'll be away in segamat.
results out on 28th so i'll only check when i'm back.
hehe. seriously hope i do well.

anyway. so far it has been really GREAT.
God is good! (i always say this. because i'm really sure of this!)


iGNITE was totally awesome.
this camp was really yet another life-changing experience.
God showed me really wonderful things.
cell groups in the tutorial rooms stretch.
worship service in auditorium.
wonderful. glorious sight.
and i'm praying still.
let there be revival in NTU.
the people need to see the light!
i'm just amazed.
how God spoke to me and showed me things.
with my mind. i can never fathom.
but God is God.
His thoughts are always higher.
the things He showed me.
i'll see them come to past one day.
God, use me.
be it in school. the final semester.
or at home. living for You.
even my future workplace.

i'm holding on to the promises of God.
cos once again i see beautiful stars in the sky during the finale night.
it is personal to me.
others may go 'chey'. but it's just a different feeling in my heart.
"as for me and my house. we're gonna serve the Lord!"

i'll see breakthroughs!
Lord, i'm going to be that HISTORY MAKER for you.

i'll stand

with arms high and heart abandoned

in awe of the One who gave it all

*

i'll stand

my soul Lord to You surrendered

all i am is Yours

just some photos the few of us took together.


the girls in the NTU cell groups.
we're going to shine and rock the campus!


more NTU people!
there's gonna be MORE!

well. i guess you can sense my excitement too.
hehe.
i'm all ignited!
what about you?

christmas is yet another season of joy.
i'm proud to say.
i've got the best gift EVER.
Jesus is that gift.
it's great to celebrate Christmas knowing why we celebrate Christmas.

the very day the Saviour was born.
One who was born to die for us.
on the cross. He died for ALL men.
that we may be once again reconciled to our Father in Heaven.
3 days later He rose.
bringing us the living hope.
that we are overcomers in Christ.
i've got the banner of victory.

are you celebrating Christmas without knowing that it's the birthday of Jesus Christ?
you're missing out something really good.
come, taste and see that the Lord is good!

i've just been thinking.
is there any meaning if people put "merry x'mas"?
cos afterall, the SUBJECT is missing.
if 'Christ' is not there. is it still Christmas?

still.
merry christmas to one and all.

i enjoyed the Christmas season giving and receiving.
well. the Bible says "it's more blessed to give than to receive". (acts 20:35)
and so i've given and i've been blessed with much.

thank God.
it's thanksgiving soon.
i've got so much to give thanks to. :)

okie. i shall be off. zzz.
will be back on 29th!

burn in me the fire

realised that i havent blogged in ages.
haha.
it's been some time.
linda say my blog gathering dust.
so i shall update a little.
before i pile up more content and have more lengthy posts.

heading for camp from 17 to 20.
so i guess it'll be good to write about what has happened thus far.
then when i'm back. write about the camp!

anyway.
just a summary.
cos i really want to go sleep soon.
and prepare myself to be fresh and ready to ignite!
hehe.


from 4 to 9 dec.
i was in segamat. this part of johor, malaysia.
went to 2 parts - jementah and pekan jabi.
on missions trip.

it was really an eye-opener.
the first time i took a train ride.
i've always passed by the railway tracks when i walk to and fro school then in my jc days.
but this is the first time i took the train.
was full of excitement for the trip.

definitely God showed His faithfulness during the trip.
He provided us with good weather on wednesday.
when we held a sports carnival there for the children and the youths.
i felt very blessed to see a beautiful scene even before the event started.
a few of us were just prayer walking at the sports field and before we started, we looked up to the sky and saw beautiful sun rays piercing through the clouds.
we just marvelled at the sight. and couldn't help wonder.
the glory of God is surely even a more magnificent sight than what we saw.
and that day. we just saw God bringing the children to the place.
though the event wasn't highly publicized. we saw 41 children coming that day.
and we had fun interacting with the children.
and i really believe God used us to sow seeds in the lives of these little ones and surely we made some impact.

i also saw how fortunate we are. how much we are provided with in Singapore.
in Singapore we have the luxury of many things.
the people there had such simple lives.
i wonder which is more of a privilege.
we went visiting some of the people.
talking to them and trying to share the Gospel with them.
some were more open.
it's just sad seeing how directionless these people were.
the people somehow don't have much that they look forward to in life.
still. i believe God is going to bring change in that place.
as we pray for the people there.
there's going to be something better that God will bring about.

i really enjoyed the time there.
my very first missions trip.
DEFINITELY more receiving than giving.
God has worked in my life and through my life.

feeling God's heartbeat for the people.
just capturing a glimpse of His love for people.
i felt so heavy a burden that my flesh was crying out.
it seemed so heavy to carry.
yet God brought assurance that His grace is more than sufficient to help me carry.

learning to take initiative.
many times during the trip.
i had to be reminded that i need to be less passive.
having to lead one of the teams on my first missions trip.
is a challenge. especially in a totally foreign place to me.
but i guess God is training me for what is ahead.
there's more that He's going to bring change in for my life.
definitely i'm one with many flaws.
but God is in the process of moulding and shaping.
don't expect me to be perfect.
i'm trying to just be better.
:)

learning to take time to wait upon the Lord.
missions trip. was a luxury.
having the time to just wait upon the Lord.
coming back. i just feel that i lack the time.
compared to the trip.
the peace. the clearer sense of direction.
that comes from soaking in His presence.
nothing can replace that.
and i need to be more sensitive to the Holy Spirit.
surely. i want to be a spirit-led child of God!

in the trip.
God also renewed the way i worship Him.
and i'm most glad.
just what i need.
i'm just thankful.
how God knows. my every need.

also. God was at work.
even before i left for the trip.
2 out of my 3 interviews were originally scheduled to be on 5th while i'm away.
thank God for His favour.
that i managed to shift them to a later date until i'm back.
it sure wasn't easy.
getting the busy partners (the big shots) to fit your time.
and i'm thankful.
praise God.
surely God is good. God is faithful.

and when i went for the interviews.
there was just this confidence.
and the peace of God.
and i thank God. all 3 companies made an offer.
so i didn't have to face rejection.
and i was telling God. please. i don't want to be rejected!
haha.
thank God for His favour.

and special thanks to linda.
who helped me with subject registration.
which was scheduled while i was away.
thanks girl.
i'm thankful that i got the time slots i wanted.
and i'm blessed with people who are willing to help.
i guess God really does send angels when you least expect Him to.

of course. life's not always smooth.
i suffered quite a hit this week.
just a few days back.

i walked out of my house.
literally. i know this sounds rebellious.
and i know i was acting horribly.

i really wonder how God's going to lead my family to Him.
cos when the fight broke out that night.
i felt totally horrible.
i know i wasn't being the exact good example at home.
i know i wasn't displaying Christ-likeness.
but really. i'm not perfect.
when i walked out.
i really almost wanted to give up.
looking at the way things are.
it just seems so hard to bring them to see the Way the Truth and the Life.
i cried and walked.
i know deep within i felt like i didn't know where i could go.
but i just walked.
and i'm glad that God knocked sense into me.
admist all that i was feeling.
i kept having so much 'impossibles' flooding my mind.
and i was telling God. show me stars. i've seldom got beautiful sight of stars.
Singapore was usually cloudy. and with the recent monsoon period. there just seems to be so cloudy. i was saying impossible to see the orion. (which in fact i really havent seen before until that night)
and just that instant i said that. i was snapped to my senses.
reminded of what God spoke of during the trip.
God doesn't have to do what i ask of Him just to prove that He is God.
He is God. and that is a fact in itself.
and upon coming to my senses. the Lord of all creation showed me beautiful stars that night.
and i saw the orion.
lovely.
i thank God.
for that reassurance that He's Lord of all. He is the One at work.
and so. i walked home.
sat down at the playground below my block.
and just read the book that i took out with me.
a horrible night. yet there was such peace that replaced all the negativity i felt.

i'm hoping. things at home will change.
really soon.
God use me.

ok. off to sleep.
and then off to camp ignite!

time to stop being lazy

haha.
i'm such a lazy bum.
haha.

well. it's time to just try and blog sthg.
since i've been slacking most of my time away.
it's been one week. since the end of exams.
which means one week of holidays already.
and i don't think i've accomplished much.

i think i took my last week recuperating from the exams.
haha.
exams seem so traumatizing.
but i guess i traumatized others more when i rejoice that exams are over.
and many of them are still busy with theirs.

this week is a bit more fruitful i guess.
but still.
i think i need to make better use of my time.
since i'm leaving on next tuesday le.
a few things that MUST be settled before i leave.


went for a visit to my 'playground' after so long.
haha.
the national library.
and borrowed a couple of books.
hehe. i guess it's a way to make myself more useful while i'm at home.
haha.


went out with mum today.
sis joined us later.
hehe.
took this while we were waiting to see the doctor.
and we both look so tired.
haha.
but still, it's a nice pic with mum.
hehe.


and mum got me a new pair of shoes.
haha.
both she and sis were commenting about how worn out my shoes were.
so she got me a new pair!
hehe.
yippie!
and she happily threw my shoes away while i was napping this afternoon.
haha.
my mum's one funny character at times.
i totally enjoyed myself today!
haha.


and christmas is just round the corner.
hehe.
i can't wait.
and i want a beautiful christmas tree.
oh i so love a white one!
haha.
though the significance of christmas is not in the trees of course.
i just thought it'll be so pretty to have one.
hehe.

oh well. i'm running out of inspiration.
tmr got to wake up.
and get started working on interview preparations!
oh man. i think i'm way too slack.
bleh.

zhi'en! buck up!