i shall update since i've cleared my deadlines for this week.
at least most of it.
there are still some things to be done.
so i'll need to keep reminding myself not to slack off.
though there are quite a handful of things to do.
i'm thankful that at least i feel enriched.
not that sitting down to think isnt good.
but sometimes it's easier to end up having quite a handful of negative thoughts.
then really meditating upon His Word.
at least for me that's the way it seems.
that's an area that i need God to correct too.
anyway.
i shall try blog something interesting.
and something that came to my mind.
had lunch with sis and ying last friday.
it's quite rare that we get to go out and eat together.
it's quite sad actually.
i really enjoyed myself that day.
truly i'm blessed in many ways.
i love my two sisters who are such great company.
had lunch at pasta mania.
it's been some time since i had that too.
and i promised ying a treat to pasta mania long time back.
i'm glad that it finally came as promised.
thanks girls. i loved the time we spent together.
let's look forward to more such friday lunches!
and some other interesting sights that i see around in school.
this was taken when i had dinner with chiewlin, linda and brendan on thursday night before i went back home.
saw this at the western food stall.
i never knew soup of the day is translated to dang1 ri4 li4 tang1.
to think i studied in a chinese school before.
haha.
how embarrassing.
i just realised mandarin is so distant now somehow.
saw this at a drinks vending machine today.
indeed the caption says "both have 0 calorie*"
note the "*".
it makes a lot of difference.
the other side picture isnt very clear.
but that's the small print.
my phone's camera isnt good enough to focus.
anyway. the small print says "* per 100 ml".
so the implication is?
for water. it's probably still 0 calorie for 330 ml.
why 330 ml. that's the volume of drink you have in a can.
but for coke light. it might well be 1 to 2 calorie for 330 ml.
my guess is that for coke light, per 100 ml, there's close to 0 calorie.
but it isn't EQUAL to 0 calorie.
so when consumed in a larger amount.
i'm pretty sure that the calorie intake won't be 0!
hehe.
so what's the lesson learnt?
that's how marketing tactics work!
read the small prints!
think!
haha.
i can't believe i can get so analytical at times.
maybe i'm just too bored by the class.
such that during the break, something like that stimulates my thinking.
hehe.
thoughts for the week.
somehow.
it's been a time for introspection.
sometimes i do that.
and probably that's why i say when i've got time to think.
it might end up being negative.
cos i evaluate myself.
looking at things.
i seem to be quite a lousy friend.
must apologise to peishan.
sorry girl.
i actually have to know what's going on in your life via your blog.
my friend for 14 years!
i guess it's really time to go read the book that weisin gave me years back.
"if i'm a good friend, i would..."
probably there's a reason why that book was a gift.
not that i'm looking too deep into things.
but i'm glad for such gifts that remind me sometimes.
that it may sound simple to be a friend.
but to really be a good friend.
it takes the effort.
and i've got to make that effort.
in a way.
i havent been a great friend because of the way i prioritise things.
God has also been dealing with my attitudes towards things.
there are things i know that i ought to invest my time in.
yet i have this tendency to set my studies above most things.
be it my family, my friends, my ministry, etc.
somehow my priorities seems screwed.
no doubt studies are important, but it aint everything.
and i came to realise that the problem doesnt only lie with the way i set my priorities.
i've got this big portion of pride within me that i fail to see at times.
the part of me that loves myself more than anything.
it's selfish and ugly.
and i've come to know that it's a major hindrance to the way i communicate with people.
studies become in a way an easy form of escapism.
what is there to communicate to books?
but when it comes to interacting with people, i've got my fears.
fears of appearing vulnerable.
though it's perfectly human to be.
fears of speaking the wrong things.
which i usually do.
but it all boils down to the way i love myself too much that i do whatever it takes to protect myself.
i must admit i dont know what it truly means to love.
it's not just in the sense of bgr.
but it's showing self-less love to people around me.
i've been receiving God's love.
yet i love myself so much that i'm keeping that love to myself.
it's really horrible.
and i guess because of this.
i've hurt people who came into contact with me.
i've neglected people who truly care and i ought to care for.
i've cast aside people who love me and i ought to love too.
i've never really knew what it is to really love.
sorry.
the times i flare up at home when things dont go right for me.
yes the problem is that i was too focused on the "me".
things didn't go wrong. i was the one that did.
sorry.
for the times i get moody cos i dont feel that i was appreciated.
yes. the problem lie in the "i" element.
sorry.
for the times i fail to find time for people.
i think i've always promised to catch up soon with many people.
cos i've really yet to see them in ages.
i always have been too busy. with what? my stuff.
yes. again. the problem with "my".
i'm appreciative that i've got people in my life who understands and cares.
peishan never once blames me for being 'too busy'.
mum tolerates my cranky times.
sis and ying helps me out whenever they can.
linda and chiewlin are people who listens to my rants.
my church friends who are concern with the way i'm coping.
and definitely many others.
it's time i return some love to show that i truly appreciate them.
i'm thankful that at different parts of my life.
things may have happened along the way.
not always positive.
sometimes, some things hurt when they happen.
but still, i'm thankful. truly.
that God is revealing to me the areas that need change in my life.
if i never come to see these.
i'll never be able to embrace the best that He has for me.
surely. i'm not perfect.
there are areas that need change.
things happen to bring about that change.
and i'm glad.
cos i've come to realise i truly need that change too.
:)
it feels good to come to this point of understanding.
now it's the action bit.
to really let that change set in my life.
it sure isnt going to be easy.
but i know i'm not alone.
He's with me.
He has placed people to help me.
in time, that change will be visible.
my loved ones, my friends: i would truly want to be a blessing.
this time. i dont ever want to make a promise i cannot keep anymore.
